One of the best friends you can have in a drug and alcohol rehab center is momentum.  How much permanent change you are able to accomplish while you are in a drug and alcohol rehab program is depandant on many factors.  One of particular importance is the ability to link one sucess to another.  Otherwise you end up with the yo-yo syndrome of moving back and forth over and over again without any real progress.  This essentialy is what chronic relapse is.  An extended cycle of drug abuse and sobriety, but no long term movement in behavior.

In the real world not one goes absolutely from one success to another without some bumps and failures.  This is not what I mean by linking one success to the next.  What this really involves is having a staircase of goals and dreams.  What I am talking about is when you achieve a goal of step you have a mini celebration and immediately have the next goal and skill ready to be worked and focused on.  If you goal is simply to become sober, you will have a great deal of difficulty maintaining it .  You will have no momentum, in fact you will have a let down as it may feel empty without knowing where to go next. 

This is why you might want to consider raising your bar of expectation, everytime you are close to succeeding.  Have your next goal in place.  Leave drug rehab with a series of accomplishments, as well as a list of future goals.  You will start a cycle of success and change.  You will move forward in your life.  It will help keep you away from relapse, and it will make rehab a lot more fun.

If changing your behavior about drug and alcohol addiction was easy, we wouldn't have a problem.  We also would not have a need for drug and alcohol rehab centers.  Changes that are difficult to achieve often involve several points along the way where we all tend to get "stuck" and hung up. 

Sometimes it is the fear of "never again" doing something.  It could be a ceratin period of time for instance.  I've heard clients say, "It doesn't matter what I try I always relapse after 2 or 3 weeks".  I could be something in your past that continues to "live on" in the present.  These walls of resistance where we have failed at before are the "stuck" points I am talking about.  We are in one of these areas personally, we often feel we are doing everything humanely possible to change.  We are giving it eveything we have.  Most times it is true.  We really are giving it everything we have.  There is a problem though.  We are trying harder and harder to get past this hurdle, but we are trying to solve it the same way. 

We use the same tools over and over again, just with more force and determination.  Most times when we get stuck in life we simply are having trouble accepting our present solution just will not work.  Then all sorts of personal doubt and fear comes in.  We start to doubt our own self worth, and if we are worthy of this change and to joys it will bring. 

Just because something is not working does not mean you are doomed or "it isn't meant to be!"  It simply means the solution you are trying with doesn't look like it will work.  The beautiful part of being in a drug and alcohol rehab center is you have a group of willing people around you to ask for help.  If you are contantly hung up at one point in you life, why not gather around 5 or 6 people and simply tell them a quick version of your problem and the solution you are using.  Then ask them for 10 other ways to tackle this problem.  Then SHUT UP!  Simply get a peice a paper and write down the ideas they come up with.  Do not comment on them in any way shape or form while they are putting down ideas.

When you get 10 or 12 writen down, ask them to think about if they were you with your skill set and your life, pick an order of 1 to 10.  Order them from their idea of the best to their opinion of the least advantageous.  Again shut up and just listen.  Thank them and leave with your new list.

Then go away by yourself to a nice quiet place in the rehab.  Look at the list.  If you could have anything in life you wanted, would you be willing to try the things on the list?  Because if you do the things on this list, you will most likely leave drug rehab well on the way to getting all the things you want.

For a drug and alcohol rehab program to be effective, it must use all styles of learning.  Education sessions need to have spoken as well as visual components to them.  Unfortunately one of the most cost effective methods of learning, may be one of the least effective in a drug and alcohol rehab center.  What I'm talking about is reading.  The number of good books out there is amazing.  Quality books designed to help anyone with almost any problem exist.  The difficulty lies in actually getting someone to read it and use it.

Reading seems to be a dying art in the world today.  Even on the internet, the power of audio and especially video is taking over.  The written word is being pushed to the back of the line.  The sad fact in drug and alcohol rehab though is the clients who actually do the reading have such a higher success rate. 

This means we have to get more creative in our approach to the problem.  With addiction often affecting attention span and the ability to focus, books might be much more useful for those studying drug and alcohol abuse then those trying to move past it.  Maybe all the imformation might be better presented in small groups and lectures with the material presented and worked on at the same time.  Having clients go through powerpoint slides with audio might be an alternative to reading.  The most powerful book in the world is useless if left unopened.

It is easy to call people lazy and unmotivated.  Who knows, it might even be true.  That doesn't change the fact we can do a better job.  We can design drug and alcohol programs assuming clients won't read and do the exercises on there own.  Failure at a drug and alcohol rehab program seems to be a steep price for not reading.

When families are faced with finding a drug and alcohol rehab center for a family member it is certainly a stressful time.  What is interesting is how stress can and will affect our decision making abilities.  It really drives home the danger of stress in our behavior.  Siblings will often phone for advice and information about the options available to them in drug and alcohol rehab.  They are looking for information in understanding addiction and steps they can take to help their family member and stay sane themselves.

When you go through the history of how addiction has affected the family from the sidlelines most times it is easy to see how the decision making process works in the family.  The old adage it is easier to see another's problems is quite true.  Often through careful questioning and suggestion you can usually lead the person to see what might be a better choice than what they are presently doing.

However following through on some of these ideas certainly can be a more stressful step.  What is clear is that when people get stressed that are very likely to return to their old behavior and decisions.  When stressed, often even the most clear family member can return to enableing addictive behavior.  Stress robs us of our best judgement, even if we don not have a problem with alcohol and drugs.

This is why stress control is such a priority in drug and alcohol rehab.  In stress we return to our tied ant true solutions, EVEN WHEN  THOSE SOLUTIONS DO NOT WORK.  It is also useful to know that when trying something new, often the doubt you feel in your new decision is linked simply to stress, and your desire to go back to what you know when you are stressed.  Write out your reasons of how and why you are choosing a new course of action.  When the stress of the actual change starts to kick in, this list will help you to stay focused on the job at hand.  It will help to stop the slide back to the same behavior patterns you are trying to change in the first place.

The more tools you have when you leave a drug and alcohol rehab center, the less stressful the transition will be.  The more ways to control stress in your life and build your confidence in your ability to handle life without drug and alcohol abuse, the calmer you will be.  Sometimes you can look to ideas and methods outside the immediate realm of drug addiction to help you.  There is an old management addage that I have heard at courses many times.  You don't get what you EXPECT, you get what you INSPECT.  In other words if you don't check for compliance of behavior and work expectations you will never get compliance to the degree you desire.  If it works for large faceless organizations why can't it work for you?

When you leave the drug and alcohol rehab program, why not set up a series of "inspections" for yourself that you will use to keep you to your planned path.  Why not arrange to be drug tested every 3 days for the first month?  Having an obective external source checking you could be very useful.  Arrange to have the results forwarded to the counselor in the rehab center you felt safest with.  It is important to know someone will be monitoring your behavior for the first while. 

Another option would be to meet with a counselor, weekly for the first couple of months.  While there get them to do a basic depression index test on you.  By tracking week to week you will be able to see if your general mood is slipping in the wrong direction.  Having someone go through your finances and accounting for all the money you spend is another way to have an inspection.  Drug and alcohol abuse takes money.  If you have someone verify all the money you spend daily for the first month would be one more way to inspect yourself for the behavior you learned in a drug and alcohol rehab program to continue.  There are no "rules" about the way you have to find your path to sobriety.  Why not write as many as you can that will support you and give you the structure you need to succede.

When you leave a drug and alcohol rehab center, and you want to have a great life, you will probably need to be able to get along with other people better.  Drug and alcohol addicition is an isolating condition and the longer it continues, the poorer you become at relating to other people.  So part of a stay in a drug and alcohol rehab program might involve learning to reconnect with people.

We have all heard the golden rule.  Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Treat others as you would like to be treated.  There are a lot of variations, all along the same theme.  Recently I heard a variant, that I thought was a real improvement on the golden rule. There was a small change, but a very powerful one.  It was, "Treat others as they would like to be treated".   This statement has two unique implications that take it to a whole new level from the golden rule.

Number one is that people are different, so most likely they may want to be treated differently.  If you treat people as you would want to be treated, you will treat them all the same.  For example, if you like small talk before discussing anything important you will then treat everyone this way.  However what about the person who just likes do get down to business, who finds small talk boring and intrusive?  They do not want to be treated the way you like to be treated.

The second difference in this new improved golden rule then becomes, you have to spend the time to get to know the person a bit so you can know how they would like to be treated.  You can't assume the way you would like something handled is the way they would like it handled.  You have to ask them some questions to figure out where they are coming from.  You have to become a better listener.

What better place to try something like this then in a drug an alcohol rehab program.  This is your chance to attempt things in a safe enviroment, and if you stumble or crash you can always simply say, "I was trying something new, sorry I didn't mean to confuse you".  then both of you can laugh and try it again.  Drug and alcohol rehab is a safe practicing ground.  Why don't you try this new golden rule a bit today?

Many drug and alcohol rehab centers base at least part of their program on the 12 steps from alcoholics anonymous (A.A.).  In the past half century since the development of A.A. many things have changed.  Society has tackled many of it's ills and life is much different than that of the 1950's.  Society is much more open and everyone's right's are much more respected and  protected. 

Many people today follow the disease model of addiction, put forth by A.A., that it is a chronic disease that requires a lifetime of treatment and relapse is part of the recovery.  In light of this, is it still good for A.A. to be anonymous?  Keeping it anonymous, may somehow reinforce the shame, that alcoholism is a disease that needs to be treated without revealing who you are.  You have done something wrong, or have something wrong with you that you need to not reveal. 

Mental illness, aids, women's right's, homosexual issues have all come out from under the cloud of silence.  Heck if you believe the ads on the television, erectile dysfunction, is a condition with such an amazing cure we should all wish for it.  So in the new century, and the year 2007 does it make sense to keep treatment anonymous? 

Keeping A.A. anonymous simply perpetuates the myth that having an addiction is something you need to be ashamed of.  It also makes it very difficult to research and improve.  An anonymous organization ran by anonymous people is not going to be easy to find the most efficient and effective ways to utilize the 12 Steps.  You could not imagine the treatment of diabetes being  anonymous with no identification of the clients, no follow up on outcome.  Why do we accept this with addiction?

We all owe a debt of gratitude to the footsteps of A.A.  They started an organization at a time when there wasn't many options open to those with drug and alcohol addiction.  Maybe by removing the anonymous from A.A. now would be a way of showing how far we really have come, and that addiction is just one of many challenges we may face in life.  And it should be treated with the same dignity, respect and science as any other condition we have.

Going to a drug and alcohol rehab program has a single major purpose.  To change your life from uncontrolled drug and alcohol use, to focused self controlled purposeful living.  The problem is that real change is difficult to see and even harded to prove.  There are lots of old saying warning us about the ability of people to change.  "You can't teach an old dog, new tricks."  "People change, but not much."

The problem with change is that most of us have tried and had setbacks in changing our habits.  We have all changed a behavior of some sort and later reverted to back to out old ways.  This is compounded in drug and alcohol rehab.  Clients have tried to stop their drug and alcohol abuse many times before arriving in a rehab center.  Their confidence in changing negative behaviors with permanence is at an all time low. 

There are two elements to change.  The first is in the ability to get the pause in your mind when presented with a stimulus that normally elicit the old programed response.  By this I mean, in the past if you were feeling particularily stressed you would have in the past reached for a drink, you pause and ask a better question.  If you can recognize a past trigger and pause and look for a new response, then you have accomplished the first phase of change. 

The second phase of change is when you automatically go to the new behavior in your mind when cued or provoked by an situation that would have lead to the old behavior you want to change.  This second phase of change obviously takes time to "re-program" your brain.  Depending on the person and the length of habit this can take months or even years.  This again goes back to the value of structure.  By planning your schedule and filling it reguarily, you force your brain to reprogram.  Desire and education will get you through the first stage of change.  Time and practice will get you through the second.  This is one of the main reasons to go to a drug and alcohol rehab center.  It will keep you safe will you make the first connection.  The daily schedule of the rehab center will get you on the beginning road to the second. 

The first weeks after leaving a drug and alcohol rehab center are the some of the most critical in the prevention of relapse.  One of the essential things to insure a transition back into normal life is to have a full and busy schedule.  It provides the safe structure to avoid unplanned and open time which might lead to poor choices.  In the first few weeks after rehab you want a lot of activities booked that you will be missed if you don't show up. 

One of the easiest to arrange, cheapest and most effective at keeping your mood positive is exercise.  There are in reality hundreds of variations to choose from.  Running clubs, yoga classes, and weight lifting exist in many towns and cities.  Choose from a groups of team sports, even if you can't play.  They always need help to organize, referee and cheer.  Lots of forms of martial arts have classes, as well as tai chi and pilates. While you are still in a drug and alcohol rehab program line up two or three a week to build your spare time around.  Throw in a course or two on some skill you need for your future.  Structure and exercise will move you to your new dreams. 

In drug and alcohol rehab programs there is a large amount of time spent on communication skills and improving them.  Good communication skills are one of those wonderful things that will affect and improve all areas of your life.  It will definately lower and control stress in your life.  It will add to the joy and happiness in your life as all of us crave and seek connection with other people.  For an skill that has such a profound effect on our lives, we spend an incredibly small amount of time improving it. 

When you leave a drug and alcohol rehab center you might want to look a these skills in a different light.  Why not think about them in the light of fitness and exercise?  We all realize and accept that you cannot go to a fitness course do it and then you are done.  We know you have to work out regularily and for the rest of your life to reap the benefits of fitness.  Thinking and examining your communication skills on a regular basis is a habit you might want to consider if you wish to leave addiction in the past for good. 

For you to progress towards your dreams and goals you need to progress in your ability to relate to others clearly.  As your life improve so will the quality of your problems and influence.  This means the skill level of communication you had in the past will not serve you as your influence in the world grows. 

Do not let the exercises and ideas on communication you learn in a rehab program be the end of your education in this area.  Once a week you might want to sit down and think about the last seven days activity.  Think about your best communication experience of the last week.  What made it work better than the rest?  Think about the intereaction that was the least effective in the past week.  What about it could you improve?  Look for courses and books that will give you even more tools in this area.  Regular improvement and practice will lead to a clean sober and rewarding life after rehab.