Sometimes things just get stuck.  Arguments get repeated over and over.  Time is wasted justifying our actions in the past.  Relationships once they are damaged can take a very long time to heal.  There is one thing; however that may speed up this process.  It involves one person simply taking the high road.  Dr. Phil appropriately calls it being a “Hero”.  It truly is a powerful and giving act.

Simply deciding the other person and the relationship is of greater value than the past.  Forgive everything, judge nothing, and be love.  If you want to change a relationship that is stuck and filled with anger, try these three things for one month.  If you are in rehab for 90 days why not try it for the whole 90.  Start with forgiving everything.  Just forgive it all.  Forgive the other person and forgive yourself.

Then judge nothing.  Make no assumptions, stop looking for errors or proof you were and are right.  Simply be grateful for the other person.  Ask and expect nothing.  Then what ever you think love is, let it show.  Give it with everything you have.  Give with no judgment or expectation.  Giving totally without expectation is a risky move some would say.  Kind of sounds like something a hero would do.  Want to really make a difference while you are in drug rehab?  Be a hero in a relationship that is damaged in your life.

We always get asked about how much time is the right length of stay in a drug rehab center?   How do you arrive at the right numbers of days?  Is there a really accurate way to judge the severity of the addiction?  Does a more severe addiction always require a longer stay?

There are two things that have to be accomplished in a drug rehab center.  One is to stay long enough to actually get a good period of clean time under your belt.  The other is to stay long enough to learn the skills.  Learn them well enough to trust them.  Trust them enough to use them on your toughest days.  This is why longer programs have better success rates.  As humans, we can only learn things at a certain rate.  If we bombard someone with more information than they can learn, they hear it, but they do not remember it. 

Learning takes time.  Practice takes time.  The time it takes to be successful sometimes may be more dependent on the speed of learning, than the severity of the addiction.  Stay the course.  Don’t take short cuts.